One Dog’s Life in Peru

Photo by Alvin Nee on Unsplash

Dear Reader, the other day I went to check my email and found this letter on my computer. I thought you might be interested. Larry

Hi Cousin,

Thanks for the letter. Isn’t this dog internet great?

My brother Falcor and I think that you have a perfect life on the farm, chasing sheep, and even catching a rabbit once in a while. Yum. Barking at the moon at night also seems like great fun. 

In comparison, life in Barranco seems quite dull. (note from Larry: Barranco is the District of Lima, Peru, where we live)

The best we can do is occasionally chase a bird. Even then our master gets mad at us. I can’t understand why.

Some ignorant humans would say that we have a perfect life, but they don’t know anything about the difficulties we face.

To give you an idea about our lives, let’s go over our daily schedule.

Usually we get up about 7:30 AM, but if we want to sleep in, it is OK. We have a flexible schedule. Don’t be deceived. Our duties extend to 24/7. We are never off! If a stranger comes early in the morning or late in the evening, we have to bark at him. Also we have to be available for petting at any hour. 

Naturally, our meals are specially prepared by nutritional experts. Not only are all the vitamins and minerals included, the food is designed to keep our teeth healthy and strong. Unfortunately, it is the same every day. BORING! An occasional organic rabbit would be wonderful. 

Usually, we have a short relaxation period after our lunch. Then, our personal trainer ( actually our master) calls us for our afternoon exercise routine. We go out to exercise twice a day, morning and afternoon, but it should be lots more often. 

We look forward to our exercise periods. However, one irritating problem is the female next door. She is a real bitch and always complains about us walking close to her territory. Her horrible behavior upsets us for a few minutes, but we soon forget.

Although the walk is pleasant, it could be better. Our master never lets us spend enough time when we come across an interesting smell or a delicious looking piece of food in the street. He is especially mean about bones that I pick up in the street, hold in my mouth so that I can enjoy them later. He tries to open my mouth and take it out. Can you imagine?

People are strange! As we walk through the neighborhood, they stop, look at us, and tell us how beautiful we are. Well, duhh. Of course, we know that. It is SOOO obvious. Humans are really simple minded.

We get back from our afternoon exercise period, and it is time for a siesta. That usually extends into the evening until our master comes home from work. Then we get to go out briefly one last time. This is a special time because there are bags full of wonderful smelling things  lying by the side of the street. Our master is a real grouch, though, and doesn’t let us do more than smell the delicious aromas that come from these bags. 

Then, when we come in, our beds are laid out in our master’s bedroom, but we often choose to sleep on the very comfortable sofa in the front room. Of course, after all that hard work, we sleep like puppies. 

Well, cousin, that is our dull daily routine. Some day maybe we can visit you at the farm and bark at the moon.


Note: After reading this letter, I had to clean dirty paw prints off my keyboard. LP

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